Compromise A Little To Keep a Whole Lot

The other night, my husband was picking up pizza when he spotted some good friends dining with a couple. They were talking politics when he stopped by their table. The woman our friends were dining with asked my husband who he would be voting for in the next election. He said, “President Obama.” In response, she called my husband a socialist and a communist and began throwing crusts of pizza at him.<

To be clear, I’m not telling you this story to start a political debate. That’s not my trip. What I do want to ask is this, “What ever happened to civility and compromise?” It seems that everywhere you look people are becoming more and more judgmental and riged in their views. Where has all this digging in our heels gotten us? Nowhere.

Compromise is not about scarcity — it’s about abundance. It’s defined as the settlement of differences by mutual concessions — mutual being the operative word.  It may not be human nature to compromise, but it is the path to conflict resolution, and ultimately peace. And obtaining peace requires us to show up in faith, not fear, and in service of the greater good.

In the work I do with my clients, I advocate telling the truth and creating consensus. I work with companies to dig deep to uncover the essence of their brands so they can inspire everyone in their organizations to reach their highest potential. During the process, leaders and workers inevitably go into a fear mode, because what has to be done requires real change.

How to I get my clients out of their own way? By constantly reminding them of the goals they want to achieve, the mission they are on and their core values. To get everyone on the same page requires compromise (and a lot of patience). Ultimately, creating a mutual consensus changes the culture and the way they do business for the better.

Should there be peace at any price? No. That’s why it’s important to be clear about the line you won’t cross.In business, the challenge—and the opportunity—when you find middle ground is to do so without compromising your core values. That’s the distinguishing line. If you compromise your core, you lose yourself. My core values are love, safety and integrity. What are yours?

Being clear will help you make decisions, and trust the decisions you make.

Perhaps the lack of civility and compromise that exists today stems from the fact that almost everything is now being run by Baby Boomers who can be a stubborn bunch. Or, maybe it’s because there are more extremists and fundamentalists ruining it for everyone in the middle. Either way, I don’t think that a rigid mentality is what’s needed in a world that’s in turmoil and so completely divided. Pizza throwing aside, I think it’s high time we started listening to each other, embracing our differences and finding common ground.

What can you do today to practice civility, strike a balance with people you are at odds with and create a happy medium?

Robin Fisher Roffer is a leading brand strategist and reinvention specialist. Founder and CEO of Big Fish Marketing, she is the author of Make A Name For Yourself: 8 Steps Every Woman Needs To Create A Personal Brand Strategy For Success, The Fearless Fish Out Of Water: How To Succeed When You’re The Only One Like You, and Reinventing Yourself: 10 Steps To Shifting Your Career Into High Gear. Learn more about Robin at: http://bigfishmarketing.com