Out at Work

Gay executives find being openly gay can lead to success.

By Paige Parvin

It’s been 15 years, but Sally Susman still feels a pang when she remembers the day her partner’s father died. She had just started a new job as a manager at American Express and had not yet revealed to her colleagues that she is gay. Fearful of their reaction, she kept quiet and stayed at the office rather than leaving to be with her partner as she grieved for her dad. Susman describes that day as one of her most difficult experiences before she became “out,” or openly gay, at work.

“One of my only regrets is that I didn’t go to her side,” recalls Susman, now executive vice president for global communications with the Estée Lauder Co. in New York. “I was afraid to tell people why I had to leave the office, afraid for my fledgling career, afraid that people wouldn’t respect me. It was at that point I decided I would not check my humanity at the office door. I would not be afraid anymore.”

The experience took an emotional toll on Susman, but her silence came with an additional price. When gay and lesbian professionals feel they have to keep their personal lives secret, anxiety about being discovered hampers effectiveness on the job. While it’s tough to put a dollar figure on the cost of being closeted, experts like Daryl Herrschaft, deputy director for the Human Rights Campaign Workplace Project, estimate a 10 percent drop in productivity for gays who hide their sexual orientation from colleagues. In a workforce considered about 5 percent homosexual, an estimate that varies depending on location and industry, those who keep their orientation secret acknowledge lost productivity.

“When I was closeted, I was always worried about being found out, slipping in some way – like someone picking up the phone when [my partner] Sally called,” says Patricia Vivado of Lehman Brothers. “I’m sure it impacted my work. If part of your mind is focusing on fear, you can’t be focusing on your job.”

But scenarios like the ones Susman and Vivado describe were much more common a decade ago than they are today. Gay executives in just about every industry are growing more comfortable in the workplace – bringing their partners to the office holiday party, papering their offices with photos of their partners and kids, and swapping Gay Pride Weekend stories at the water cooler.

“It’s definitely much better than it used to be,” says Justin Nelson, executive director for programs and advocacy at the National Gay and Lesbian Chamber of Commerce in Washington, D.C. “Corporate America has woken up and realized there is value in treating individuals as a whole, allowing them to be themselves so they are able to perform at 100 percent of who they are.”

Eighty-two percent of America’s 500 largest revenue-producing companies, and 49 of the top 50, now prohibit discrimination on the basis of sexual orientation. (ExxonMobil is the only one that does not include sexual orientation in its non-discrimination policy.)

“It comes down to dollars and cents,” Herrschaft says. “Employers want to be able to attract and retain the brightest employees, and one way to do that is to make sure they are treated equitably. Not only can the employees bring their whole selves to work, but it also pays dividends to the company’s bottom line.”

Susman, for one, kept her promise to bring her whole self to work. Today she is one of thousands of executives who are “out” and openly gay in the workplace. “I think my generation was the first to believe that you could be both openly gay and highly successful in corporate life,” she says. “While it was difficult to come out at work, it is much more painful to be closeted at work.”

Like so many lesbian professionals, Vivado opened up to her colleagues in stages. Despite the finance industry’s dubious reputation when it comes to diversity, “the reception was really positive,” she says.

Vivado now serves as vice president of global diversity and inclusion at Lehman Brothers. Like any proud parent, she works in an office surrounded by photos of Melinda, now 5, and her partner, Sally Hammel, a finance officer for a media company. Hammel is a regular fixture at company functions where the invitation includes “spouse or partner.”

For Vivado, being honest has always been critical to becoming a well-rounded, fully committed employee. “I needed to feel I was part of a team, that I could be who I am without worrying constantly about using the right pronouns and talking about what I did over the weekend.”

Now that her work is focused on diversity, Vivado says it’s rewarding to help create a place where everyone can feel safe. “People who decide to come out immediately feel a sense of relief and openness, like a weight has been lifted,” she says. “Nobody regrets being out.”

They’re here. They’re queer. Now what?

As gay executives open up the closet door in greater numbers, companies need to know how to respond.

On paper. There is no federal law protecting gay men and lesbians from discrimination in the workplace, so it’s up to individual companies to decide whether to include sexual orientation in their own policies. A gay-inclusive non-discrimination policy is the first thing gay executives look for when considering a company.

Back it up. When gay-friendly policies are in place, human resource managers should also have a clear plan for enforcing them. “If an employee feels a manager is treating them unfairly, there should be recourse for that person,” says Patricia Vivado, head of diversity for Lehman Brothers.

Partner benefits. After the non-discrimination policy, domestic partner benefits are the most critical measure of a company’s gay-friendliness. Of America’s top-500 companies, 216 provide benefits to domestic partners of gay employees, a number that has increased tenfold during the last 10 years, according to the Human Rights Campaign’s 2004 State of the Workplace report.

Networking and mentoring. A gay networking group is also a positive sign to gay employees. “These are visible indications that this company is not simply about policy, but trying to live the spirit of the policy,” says Daryl Herrschaft, deputy director for the Human Rights Campaign Workplace Project.

This article originally appeared in the December.January 2006 issue of PINK Magazine.