Are You A Nuclear Reactor? May 22, 2013Expert BlogsOff

Last week I wrote about the internal dilemma of deciding when to say it, how to say it and when to just stuff it. But this week, I realized that we often foul things up because most of us have an underlying need to react to everything that comes across our desk or computer screen with immediacy. We’re in a deliver-it-fast, quick-as-lightening work world where reacting immediately is expected, but at what price?

If you have a strong personal brand and you’re really putting yourself out there, then you’re exposing yourself to receiving emails, tweets and press that can push your buttons. You can choose to react defensively or use manipulation, intimidation, throw a few well-placed jabs, put on the “poor me” act, or respond by yelling in all caps “YOU JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND!”

Or you can decide to not react at all.

It takes a lot of discipline to react without emotion or to simply hit delete. Lately, I’ve been using one-liners like “You’re probably right” or “Gee, I never thought of it that way” or “I hear what you are saying.” My God it’s freeing to not play into someone’s hand or have to be the one that’s right. So why does it feel easier to react out of judgment or out of fear when we should be taking a step back to consider the source and listen to our gut?

We live in a society that is fixated on pundits and politicians who react to our complicated times with anger and hate. “Let’s drop a bomb on them!” gets applause. “They should all be electrocuted!” gets cheers. When we should be giving airtime to people who embody kindness, love and peace – who know that every negative word they speak or write carries with it power and consequences.

Count how many times a day you react instead of giving a thoughtful, unemotional response. You may be surprised to find out you are in fact a nuclear reactor.

If that’s the case, next time you find yourself wanting to negatively respond to a situation or communication, just do the opposite of what you would normally do. Try sleeping on it. I think that you’ll find that there is power in silence.

It’s true that we are wired to reply, to respond to act. But if we do it foolishly or impetuously it can torpedo relationships and reputations. Isn’t it time you think before you react?

Robin Fisher Roffer is a leading brand strategist and reinvention specialist. Founder and CEO of Big Fish Marketing, she is the author of Make A Name For Yourself: 8 Steps Every Woman Needs To Create A Personal Brand Strategy For Success, The Fearless Fish Out Of Water: How To Succeed When You’re The Only One Like You, and Reinventing Yourself: 10 Steps To Shifting Your Career Into High Gear. Learn more about Robin at: http://bigfishmarketing.com

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