The Most Precious Gift Indeed May 22, 2013Expert BlogsOff

There once was a little girl full of imagination and positivity who went to sleep each night in her twin bed tracking the brightest star in the night sky until she fell fast asleep, dreaming of what life would bring. She regularly awoke early in the mornings with a sense of adventure and excitement, leapt from her bed, quickly got dressed so she could take out her baby doll. She dressed her, fed her, changed her diapers, placed her on the blanket in the stroller at the foot of her bed and wheeled her through the house, out the side door, and up the street to get all those necessary tasks in life only a little girl could dream up. She was especially excited when she pushed the kitchen chair to the rotary phone on the wall, hoisted herself on her tippy toes and dialed 6… 6… 9… 2… 7… 0… 4 to reach her best friend Tawnya to make plans to meet her at the driveway. Tawnya also had her stroller, her baby and all the necessary accessories for their daily journey to Main Street to get the mail at the post office, groceries at the little store, and of course, greet everyone they passed in their journey. And, the last stop, an ice cream cone for everyone before the trip back home! Life could not have been any better for the two little “mommies.”

And then, in what seems an instant, life changed. It became more hectic and complicated. The little girl moved from the small town and lost track of her little best friend Tawnya. The baby doll ended up in a box in the basement of her parent’s house with all the little clothes crumpled next to the tiny bottles, diapers, rattles, and toys. Homework, tests, piano, basketball, track, certifications, graduations, multiple part-time jobs, endless tasks and “requirements” took over her life. School led to careers filled with endless meetings, PowerPoint presentations, 80-plus hour workweeks, the “must-win” clients and “must-prove” new businesses. Old pink strollers and blankets were replaced with business plans, return on investment, scaling projects, P&Ls, spreadsheets, and ever-shifting politics.

Yet, the memory and hope of re-living those early mommy years never left her. At least five times a day, that little girl, now all grown up and married, wondered if it could ever really happen. Would she ever be a mommy? Sadly, despite countless attempts with her husband to bring the memory to life, the result was always the same: Negative. Years passed, and with the intensifying pressure and ultimate painful and devastating divorce, it suddenly seemed as though her dream of having a child of her own could not be realized. So, perhaps the best thing to do, she thought, was to put the whole mommy idea out of her mind and move on with life. After all, she did have parents and siblings who loved her, and whom she loved very much, great friends, and a fulfilling career. Convinced of this unfortunate reality, with great vigor she continued to inundate herself in work. Perhaps to help her own psyche, she even conveyed to others with conviction that she could impact more lives by staying focused on her career than she could being a mommy. There was always more to do, more meetings, more phone calls, voicemails and a never-ending screen filled with emails to keep her mind from wandering. “Stay focused!!” she kept telling herself…”If not you, who? Lead girl, lead!”

But then very special days came when she became an Auntie to a beautiful little nephew and niece named Nicholas and Sophie, and a deep and powerful joy warmed her heart. Looking deep into little Sophie’s’ bright blue eyes was magical. She didn’t just see Sophie’s irises. Instead she saw something similar to a kaleidoscope of life. She saw that little girl in the small town and in an instant, her entire life fast-forwarded. In little Sophie, she saw her own spirit, personality, strength, pursuit, and determination. And she saw an even more intensified reason to keep her faith alive… in being a mommy, and in the powerful work of changing the possibilities for little Sophie’s and Nicholas’ everywhere by helping to ensure they had different paths than the one she had endured to achieve their lives’ goals and dreams.

As if the birth of the beautiful babies was a sign from the heavens, things started to change for her. The amazing person who always made her laugh…the one she always called when she had great news or when she was struggling…that person right in front of her heart and eyes for more than three years and yet she never quite realized was, in fact, exactly what she needed the entire time! He walked – more like danced – right into her life! She asked for the music on his iPod and he asked her to dinner and the mutual love, passion and admiration and respect appeared instantly! They say the best things in life are right in front of you! It certainly was true in this case. That was the day her friend Sohrab turned her life upside down and inside out…in a profound way! Funny how that happens and even more miraculous as it turned out… he too wanted to become a daddy. Things were going to work out just great after all, or could they? All the darkness and the hurt of years past came back to her with the pressure, and the pain of not being able to conceive a baby and have a family! Only this time, things turned out differently.

The magic did happen. I am that little girl from the small town… and I am thrilled to announce that thirty-some years later, my love and I are blessed to be expecting a beautiful little baby! With the grace of God, April will be one of the best months of our lives…the time when our new little wolf cubby (boy or girl) will enter our world. We will both shower that sweet baby with as much love as we can possibly garner. A miracle indeed! Blessed indeed! THE most precious gift INDEED!

By Julie Gilbert

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