Choosing to Thrive May 22, 2013Expert BlogsOff

Thriving in today’s challenging environment is really about turning adversity into opportunity. Accomplishing that requires developing a deep understanding of yourself and how you can best find fulfillment in all aspects of your life. But the key point here is that thriving is a choice. It’s the fork in the road of your journey to living your purpose and expressing your passions.

The journey presents choices to each of us everyday—choices that can contribute to our sense of thriving or drain us of hope for the future. You can choose to just survive, for example, viewing your work as merely a means to an economic end. Going to work each day then is an act of putting in your time, doing the minimum required of you and collecting a paycheck.

Perhaps instead, you choose to strive for material gain, with the thought that a more impressive house, a faster car, a better pair of shoes will make you a better person in the eyes of others. The reality is that the effort you engage in to add to the collection of “stuff” that you amass is equivalent to applying a meager salve on the festering wound of the void that exists in your life. When you live in a process of striving, there is often a sense of a vessel half full, another objective yet to achieve, and an interminable wait for some time in the future when you can (finally) relax into yourself and smile. And with all of the anxious striving, you often find that “more” doesn’t equate to “enough”. Instead you discover that you’ve missed out on the best moments of today–time that can never be retrieved.

Imagine thriving as a healthier alternative. When you are thriving you:

  •  Wake up each day to a life of purpose and passion
  • You do work resonant with your passions
  • You can be you, without apology or explanation
  • You take personal ownership of the direction of your life and you stay on your path.
  • You’re able to observe what goes on around you without succumbing to the drama. 
  • And you remember that you A Hitchhiker’s Guide to Thriving

    Two of the keys to thriving are paying attention to the lessons you’ve learned in life and gathering insights from others’ perspectives. Each of us is in essence like a hitchhiker in search of a guide to the galaxy, and if we’re open we can learn from one another. So take a minute today to hop into the passenger’s seat of my experience and let me share a few hard earned lessons that might support you on your journey:

    1. Life throws you curve balls. It’s what you do with them that counts. Reflect on your own past experiences and the unanticipated detours you encountered. Did you make the most of those experiences? What might you do differently next time? Do you need a bigger catcher’s mitt?
    2. If you run into a series of brick walls, it’s time to ask a different question. When things start feeling difficult or unyielding, stop and ask yourself why. Are you going about things the wrong way? Are you not working hard enough? Is this a sign of one door closing so another can open? Is the right action to do absolutely nothing?
    3. Life is about leaping into the possibilities. Yes, it’s important to ponder, analyze the facts and do your homework. Wishing things to be so, however, is not a substitute for effort. At some point, you have to act because no progress can occur without action.  And sometimes it requires a huge leap, like being on a high wire with no net. Get comfortable with flying.
    4. Trust your gut. Once all of the facts are in at some point it boils down to what you sense intuitively. We are naturally intuitive creatures so connecting to that inner voice is a potent tool for success. Honor that inner knowing.
    5. Listen to your body. The body is a barometer for what feels good and what doesn’t in relationships and at work. If you find yourself in pain, having headaches, twinges, anxiety or other signs of discomfort they are signals that it’s time to make a change.
    6. Don’t let anyone define you. Your identity is yours alone. Trying to wear a costume made for someone else is exhausting at best and rarely works. However, rejecting how others define you requires that you accept accountability for exploring and defining who you are and how you want to be in service to the world. If you wear a label, at least let it be one of your own choosing.
    7. Life is messy, so get comfortable with disorder. Your desk is not perfect, your house is in disarray, your sweater drawer is mess and walking into your closet is a life threatening undertaking. Get over it! Sometimes the objective is not to be all caught up. Sometimes it’s enough to “remain reasonably behind.”
    8. Courage and persistence count! Building the capacity to thrive takes time, so perseverance is your ally. Living your dreams requires that you demonstrate courage because there will be times when you don’t enjoy the support that you deserve or doubt your own worth. But isn’t it far more frightening to wallow where you are and extinguish any possibility for a better tomorrow?
    9. Life is not a dress rehearsal, but it is more than a one-act play. With most things in life, you have the opportunity for a re-do. You’ll get another shot at your dreams if you’re open and willing to create the opportunity. Don’t waste time regretting missed opportunities. Work to create new possibilities.
    10. Celebrate exponentially more than you lament. Taking the time to joyfully acknowledge the good moments in life tends to breed more of them. Before rushing off to the next objective on your list, celebrate what you’ve already accomplished. Stop. Breathe. Smile. Laugh out loud. Gather your tribe and party!

    Alaina Love, President of Purpose Linked Consulting (PLC) is an internationally recognized leadership development consultant and speaker. She is co-author of The Purpose Linked Organization: How Passionate Leaders Inspire Winning Teams and Great Results (McGraw-Hill, 2009) http://amzn.to/ijBJaX 

    The book identifies and explores the impact of the ‘Passion Archetypes’ of great leaders, provides a process for leaders to maximize the individual passions on their teams, and offers free access to The Passion Profiler™ online tool, where readers can discover their own passions and how to apply them to their roles at work.

    To find out more about Alaina’s work on leadership, passion and employee engagement click here to Purpose Linked Consulting’s website.

     

     

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