By Carol Holm
When seeing people who achieve great things with seemingly little effort, it’s easy to conclude that their abilities are superior. But the fact everyone has the potential to achieve. But it isn’t ability that makes the difference. Self-image is what determines parameters for success.
Self-image is this picture from each woman’s past experiences, failures and successes, and the way others react. It’s the determining factor that dictates behavior and lifestyle. It determines career choice, how money is handled, the definition of success and the quality of relationships.
A great deal of the original programming for self-image occurs by the age of five, and much of it is complete by age 12. This original programming will always be with us; it’s not like a bad computer program that can be thrown away and replaced with a better one. However, everyone has the ability – through thoughts and choices – to create a new self-image that can override the original one. In other words, we have the power to reprogram our self-image.
Success in any endeavor, whether it’s health, financial, sports, career or relationships has the same formula, and it all begins with developing the right habits. Once you decide to program your self-image for success, the positive results come almost effortlessly.
Here’s how to reprogram a self-image:
Changing habits: This is done by making a list of 12 habits to change; and then working on one new habit each month. As much as 90 percent of everyday behavior is based on habit. When habits are changed, self-image automatically changes. It takes about 21 days to change a habit, but my experience has taught me that it can take more or less time depending on how willing we are to accept it as part of our self-image; so work on each habit until it no longer requires effort.
Desired self-image: Write a description of your desired self-image and read it daily. This is a blueprint of the person you want to be. You can write it as a detailed paragraph or make a list. It doesn’t matter what the format is, as long as it helps you to imagine the person you want to be.
What you want to be true: Every time you say something to yourself about yourself, you are programming your self-image. It’s what you say to yourself and not what others say to you that programs your mind.
The silver lining: Attach a positive meaning to each event that happens to you. The formula is
E + R = O (event + the response = the outcome). We can’t control what happens to us, but we can learn to control our response to those event. This is why challenging times can either propel a person to greater heights or destroy her self-confidence.
Positive recreation: Choose books, movies, TV and friends that have a positive impact on your self-image. What you continually expose yourself to, you will eventually incorporate into your life. It’s a known adage that we become like the five people we spend the most time with.
Carol Holm is a financial advisor for the firm of Carol Holm Financial and author of Take the Lid Off: Unleashing Your Unlimited Potential. Her book offers step-by-step tips on how to use your mind to reach your goals.
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